Potty training: I’m still mopping up the mess

I think I’d assumed that potty training was going to be a swift affair.  Girls are easier than boys they say.   They also say if you leave it until your child seems really ready, till there’s some bladder control and an understanding, there’s a greater chance of success.   Yet here we were, on day 3, and it seemed we were still more than a tad accident prone.  Having spent 2 days mopping up wee from the kitchen floor, we’d moved into the sitting room to relieve the boredom and play with the train set.  By 1030a.m. we’d had our first accident.  On the train set.  I tried to remain positive as I mopped it up:  I suppose at least now the painted blue Thames that runs through the train set was an actual river, albeit 100% urine.

There was a sense of cabin fever in the air, for both B-P and I.  One of the books said by day 3 you can plan a little outing.  It suggested that you’d now have an idea how often your toddler weed and could schedule a short trip outdoors.  My notes on the past 48 hours showed no signs of a pee pattern, and venturing out, even to stroll down the lane, felt like my Everest.  So I decided we’d stay in again. As the day went on, at the back of my mind there was a sense of mild doom.  Strong word ‘doom’ but that’s how it can feel sometimes when you’re questioning your parenting skills.  It was partly because I knew if we weren’t successful within a week or so, we might have to decide to call time on it for a few weeks and try again.  Which meant another possible week of cabin fever.  But also we had less accidents during the afternoon of day 3.  Not because we had more successes.  But because B-P just wasn’t weeing.  By the time we’d hit 3 1/2 hours without a trickle, my over anxious brain had gone straight to a place where she was holding it in and had developed some sort of potty fear.  Really that’s where my brain went to.  Rational eh?

In a previous post I talked about needing to keep your ‘bucket’ full, so small things don’t get to you so much. I think this was probably one of those times, where you needed a full bucket so each little accident doesn’t chip away at you.  Realising that my bucket might be a little empty, I decided to dig deep, take some soothing breathes, and try not to panic about B-P developing toilet fear and urine infections.  40 minutes later my anxiety was lifted when she finally weed.  On the train set. At the start of day 4, I was reading the books again and looking at lots of blog posts, searching for advice on what to do if your toddler hasn’t read the books and isn’t following the 1 week plan.  I was aware that my anxiety levels were a little high, and decided that today, we would just see how it goes.  I’d make less of a big deal about ‘sitting and having a little squeeze’, and just let B-P lead the way. By the end of day 4 things were no different.  We hadn’t moved forward, we hadn’t moved back.  I wondered if B-P just wasn’t ready for, and perhaps was even a bit disinterested in big girl pants.  Perhaps it was time, to call time on this round of potty training?


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